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  • Probate Research

    Sometime in the job I do, you have to do it by any means and this is one such time.

    I found this site whilst I researching and pleased I have, but when I joined this site it was to contact one person.

    I was researching a person who died many years ago and didn't leave a will.

    It turns out that a valued member of your forum is legally able to make a claim for the money left unclaimed.

    I don't think it comes to any great fortunes, but I do think after all the deductions from the Treasury it will put 3 grand plus in her hand.

    So I joined your forum, sent the person in question a message to ask if I could look at her family tree, she asked why, I told her breifly and since I have been totally blanked.

    Now clearly I can see her online, as the green light tells me she is so that leave a couple of reasons.

    1, She thinks I am winding her up, which I am not.
    2, She wants to do it herself so I get blanked for my commission.

    Tracking lost relations for me is hard enough some times (being a small business) it's extra hard in this situation.

    So I say this to the lady in question as a final appeal to her..

    If you think I am winding you up, trying to cheat or con you, then let me put my research on here, on open forum for all to see, with your word I will get my commission, as afterall, this is how I earn my living.


    That way if I am wrong, telling lies or mentally disturbed then the whole forum will know..

    And if I am right you gain a good few quid and so do I.

  • #2
    Just in case the member in question feels uncomfortable posting a reply on here, can I just add a few comments.

    A friend of mine has recently been approached by someone over a similar issue and one of the things that struck her, and finally led to her reluctance to go ahead, is the secrecy of the whole thing!

    I realise, of course, that you need to be discreet with your initial contact but I think the person you are making contact with does need to see that you work for a reputable company (and I am not suggesting here that you don't!). Just because the possible beneficiary doesn't want to go ahead it doesn't necessarily mean that he/she wants to go it alone, maybe they are a very private person and reluctant/hesitant to deal with a total stranger. I know if I was in the same circumstances I would be very wary too!
    Elaine







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    • #3
      Hi Elaine thanks for replying.

      I have to agree in principal with your post totally.

      When this comes to a conclusion, I think it would be clear why I had to do it this way, sometimes there is no choice, as although I am 100% this is the lady in question, I was unable to write to her due to the volume of people that had the same name as her beofre she married. Needle/haystack etc.

      The only real option I had was to join the forum and message her.

      Elaine I totally understand the last points of your message, I really do, but please may I respectfully add that if the lady in question is worried in any way of making contact then ask a friend or relation to make contact as I have left a number.

      Comment


      • #4
        I would like to add my tuppence worth.

        If as you say you are a person who earns your living doing this type of work and it is your own business with you as the only employee then I think you need to be more upfront about yourself. What would help me if I was the person you had approached would be some sort evidence that you had an office address, a land line number and or some other means of contacting you.

        We have all become very wary of approaches by people who seem to exist only in the 'ether' and therefore we are reluctant to take what they say and offer seriously.

        This person is sure of her identity but not of yours or your motives however much you try to convince her by using this medium.

        A professional person would not baulk at this approach.

        Margaret
        Last edited by margaretmarch; 14-02-12, 13:21.

        Comment


        • #5
          Interestingly there has been a section in the recent LostCousins newsletter on this very topic.

          The problem - as Margaret has just said - seems to be that you know how honest you are, but it's very reasonable for the recipient of your message to be wary of someone trying to elicit information about her ancestry, if that same info is of the kind that could be used in the process of "stealing" her identity.

          Christine
          Last edited by Christine in Herts; 14-02-12, 13:28.
          Researching: BENNETT (Leics/Birmingham-ish) - incl. Leonard BENNETT in Detroit & Florida ; WARR/WOR, STRATFORD & GARDNER/GARNAR (Oxon); CHRISTMAS, RUSSELL, PAFOOT/PAFFORD (Hants); BIGWOOD, HAYLER/HAILOR (Sussex); LANCASTER (Beds, Berks, Wilts) - plus - COCKS (Spitalfields, Liverpool, Plymouth); RUSE/ROWSE, TREMEER, WADLIN(G)/WADLETON (Devonport, E Cornwall); GOULD (S Devon); CHAPMAN, HALL/HOLE, HORN (N Devon); BARRON, SCANTLEBURY (Mevagissey)...

          Comment


          • #6
            Hi Margaret

            Thanks for you reply.
            Firstly I don't totally agree with your post but by the same token don't really want to dig myself into a hole.

            It comes down to this..if I had had another way of doing it I would have, once this is all said and done, whichever way it goes, it will be clear why this was my only option.

            I am a small business, I work from home and I am not set up in the way the big companies are..but then I simply don't need to be.

            I pick on old cases of small value to avoid the big companies, as I can't compete with them.

            Which ever way you look at it the facts speaks for themselves..

            I can prove beond doubt in minutes everything I have said is true, so therefore if you guys think I am dodgy in anyway call my bluff and ask me to prove it..

            The only thing I ask which I think is fair is that I get my commission..

            Comment


            • #7
              Hi Christine thanks for you reply.

              Christine why don't I private message you the proof I have, as people would trust you and in return you look at it and see if what I am saying stacks up.

              But obviously I would rather you not give out the actual details to others.
              Last edited by Guest; 14-02-12, 13:43. Reason: Spelling

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by FMK View Post
                Hi Margaret

                Thanks for you reply.
                Firstly I don't totally agree with your post but by the same token don't really want to dig myself into a hole.

                It comes down to this..if I had had another way of doing it I would have, once this is all said and done, whichever way it goes, it will be clear why this was my only option.

                I am a small business, I work from home and I am not set up in the way the big companies are..but then I simply don't need to be.

                I pick on old cases of small value to avoid the big companies, as I can't compete with them.

                Which ever way you look at it the facts speaks for themselves..

                I can prove beond doubt in minutes everything I have said is true, so therefore if you guys think I am dodgy in anyway call my bluff and ask me to prove it..

                The only thing I ask which I think is fair is that I get my commission..
                Why don't you ask the person concerned how you can convince her? It's all well and good trying to convince anyone else on the forum but it is her that has to be satisfied. If you don't convince her then you won't get a commission anyway.

                Margaret

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quote..

                  Why don't you ask the person concerned how you can convince her?

                  How do I do that when she won't reply to me?

                  It's all well and good trying to convince anyone else on the forum but it is her that has to be satisfied. If you don't convince her then you won't get a commission anyway.


                  Well actually that is not quite correct, in as much I will find another family member at some point but it might take a lot of man hours to do.


                  Comment


                  • #10
                    But if there is another family member surely the claim for the forum member is ultimately a lot less than you are quoting. Also isn't it the case that all beneficiaries have to be found to make a claim?

                    You can still contact her and state your case again giving more information about yourself and the reason you seem to be so secretive about the whole thing.

                    Margaret

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      [QUOTE=margaretmarch;2351778]But if there is another family member surely the claim for the forum member is ultimately a lot less than you are quoting. Also isn't it the case that all beneficiaries have to be found to make a claim?


                      That's not factually correct

                      You can still contact her and state your case again giving more information about yourself and the reason you seem to be so secretive about the whole thing.

                      There is only one reason and one part I am secretive!

                      Margaret how many time do you contact the same person, about the same thing without a reply?

                      I am more than happy to reveal all on open forum, private message, telephone, email or indeed face to face..

                      As I have already said if there was another way open to me I would have took it respectfully.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Well whatever has been said or done you have spooked her and that I fear is going to be difficult to retrieve.

                        Good luck anyway.
                        Margaret

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I would like to know how you "found" this person on this forum since most of us don't use our real names?????? I know I would bin a message like that out of the blue.

                          I don't know if you are ligitimate or not but the very first post you made on this thread strikes me as looking like some of the spam I get. My suggestion would be to change the approach and make it clearer that you really are what you say.

                          Sorry to be suspicious but I suspect I'm not alone.

                          Anne
                          Last edited by Anne in Carlisle; 14-02-12, 15:03.

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                          • #14
                            I don't know if you are ligitimate or not but the very first post you made on this thread strikes me as looking like some of the spam I get. My suggestion would be to change the approach and make it clearer that you really are what you say. quoted from post #13 by Anne in Carlisle

                            Hear! Hear!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Have to say in FMK's defense, that it is sometimes very easy to work out where people live from what they post on forums, and I am not just talking about FTF here. It is why we are always telling people to be careful what they post on the internet! Even our general forum, which does not get picked up by search engines, is still in the public domain!

                              Also, don't forget that FMK is interested in making a link between the member and a deceased ancestor. We have the surname directory, our Anniversaries calendar as well as a GEDCOM database where these names may have been found, as well as your research requests on the forums.
                              Elaine







                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Elaine, are you saying that FMK has found where this member lives?

                                I thought he had just identified her as someone he wanted to be in touch with from the research that he had done in finding descendants.

                                What Anne in Carlisle is saying is how did he make the link between a name he has found elsewhere and a person on here using a fictitious name like many people do.

                                Margaret

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  No sorry, you misunderstood me.

                                  FMK is presumably looking for a family member of a deceased person - let's say that person is John Smith born 1900, died 1982.
                                  He finds on a genealogy site that same person in a tree or in a research request on a forum. How often do we say, my grandfather .. John Smith was born in 1900 - I have found his death in 1982 etc.
                                  He can then tie up that member with that Ancestor, regardless of the username that person is using on the forum.
                                  He has presumably done a bit more research and found that the granddaughter that he is looking for is Elaine Smith (for example) - he finds me on a forum talking about my grandfather John Smith and then presumes that I am the one he is looking for .. and makes contact.

                                  I am not suggesting that he knows where the member lives!!
                                  Elaine







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                                  • #18
                                    Oh right - I did misunderstand!

                                    Margaret

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                                    • #19
                                      Margaret, I had little other choice..but to do it the way I have..

                                      Anne in Carlisle, I think when we get to the bottom of this, I am sure that when you see how I arrived at the conclusion I have you will clearly understand.

                                      Elaine, you almost got it spot on.

                                      The lady in question has now private messaged me and hopefully we can move forward to bring this to a conclusion.

                                      If I may go back to Annes comment about finding people I have this to say..

                                      Anne you live in Calisle and if I read through your 2000+ posts on here they would give lots of clues away about you.

                                      If I then Googled the facts I know then lots of other little bits about your life would be revealled.

                                      It's like a 10,000 jigsaw, you might not get it all done straight away, but by finding this little piece and adding another little piece and before you know it you have have the picture and that is why I am worth the commision I charge.
                                      Last edited by Guest; 14-02-12, 18:06. Reason: Spelling

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                                      • #20
                                        P.S. a very nice lady has just given me consent to use this thread to prove my case.

                                        I am just waiting for consent from the lady that I am able to use her username and I will happily put my research on here for all and sundry to consider.

                                        Then a lot of question mainly from margaret will be answered.

                                        Comment

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