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  • Should I or should I not

    I am visiting the Island of Skye soon and one of the reasons for the visit is that part of my family came from a place called Strath in Skye and I wanted to see what it's like.

    They came from a place called Torrin and on many of the censuses they are living at the same croft. I have a feeling some of the crofts are still there and my question is - should I knock on the door and say hello or is that too rude or would it make the owner feel uncomfortable. It's looks like the surname of my family are still living in some crofts in the area

    Just wanted to see what you think

    Steven

  • #2
    That's certainly a tricky one. There are so many unknowns.

    Supposing you do knock - what are the possible hazards? The person who answers doesn't approve of family tree research; they're having a bad day and don't want visitors; they think it's a con; ... perhaps you can think of more. You could easily be sent away "with a flea in your ear".

    The possible positive outcomes: You're given a welcome; you're allowed to look around; there turns out to be a connection of some kind.

    It's very tricky. I was in Florida, and we found the house where my errant grandfather had lived. I took a photo of the outside, but I didn't feel comfortable about knocking on the door. Should I have done? I still don't know, but I don't worry about it.

    Christine
    Researching: BENNETT (Leics/Birmingham-ish) - incl. Leonard BENNETT in Detroit & Florida ; WARR/WOR, STRATFORD & GARDNER/GARNAR (Oxon); CHRISTMAS, RUSSELL, PAFOOT/PAFFORD (Hants); BIGWOOD, HAYLER/HAILOR (Sussex); LANCASTER (Beds, Berks, Wilts) - plus - COCKS (Spitalfields, Liverpool, Plymouth); RUSE/ROWSE, TREMEER, WADLIN(G)/WADLETON (Devonport, E Cornwall); GOULD (S Devon); CHAPMAN, HALL/HOLE, HORN (N Devon); BARRON, SCANTLEBURY (Mevagissey)...

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    • #3
      I was tending towards that Christine I never set out on my research to annoy anyone and probably best not to go sticking my nose in. Sounds like good advice thanks

      Photos seem like the best plan

      Regards

      Steven

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      • #4
        I can only tell you what I would do (have done) Steven.
        I would carry a camera and knock on the door. When they answered I would smile and explain that my ancestors used to live there and ask if they minded if I took a photograph of their home.
        As Christine (the other one :D) says, the worst they can do is to say no and they might welcome you.

        p.s. I meant a photograph of the OUTSIDE of course.
        Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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        • #5
          I kind of thought about that and it's sounds like good advice. Maybe just have a wee look, some photos and take it from there.

          Thanks

          Steven

          PS I also meant a photo of the outside of the croft would never presume or to be cheeky and ask for a look inside lol!!!!!!!

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          • #6
            Nothing ventured nothing gained is my motto and I would always knock and politely ask if I could take a photo and if they were possibly connected to me. I have mostly found that people are often more than happy to talk about themselves and be involved in something a bit 'different'.
            Margaret
            Last edited by margaretmarch; 06-04-11, 22:49.

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            • #7
              I agree, many years ago we visited the house where my grandmother grew up and knocked on the door to ask if we could take a picture of the outside. The owner was really interested and even invited us in to look around but we declined as didn't want to impose. We have several pictures of the outside though.
              Jenny

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              • #8
                Much to my husband's horror I have knocked on doors 3 times to ask permisson to photograph - (he waits shamefully across the road). I had copies of the census with me and copies of photos of the ancestors. I got permission to photograph all three, and two invited me in, and I left the census & photos with them and followed up with a thankyou card.

                Asked permisson to photograph inside a Sam Smith's pub in London and was told in no uncertain terms that I'd be ejected if I did!

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Jill on the A272 View Post
                  Much to my husband's horror I have knocked on doors 3 times to ask permisson to photograph - (he waits shamefully across the road). I had copies of the census with me and copies of photos of the ancestors. I got permission to photograph all three, and two invited me in, and I left the census & photos with them and followed up with a thankyou card.

                  Asked permisson to photograph inside a Sam Smith's pub in London and was told in no uncertain terms that I'd be ejected if I did!
                  How ridiculous that a PUBLIC house should deny you photographs - are they suggesting that anyone having a 'get together' there could not take photos - what a jobsworth!!

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                  • #10
                    Is there likely to be a small shop/pub/church where you could make some general enquiries about the family of your interest living in the area. Even stopping someone on a street to ask a general question about a family name can often be helpful. I have done this in remote areas of Ireland and have been pleasantly surprised. One person told me about some Gowans living at a farm down the road and another told me about a Kennedy family living in another rural part. We followed the Gowans one up who gave us many details about the family and showed us where many were buried. Can be fruitful in remote areas and a bit more intrusive in city/town/villlage where you can get rejections.

                    Janet

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                    • #11
                      Years ago, my brother went to a remote farmhouse where our ancestors had lived for generations and when the owners saw my brother coming up the path they set the dogs on him, pmsl.

                      OC

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                      • #12
                        I went to a place wher my mothers family lived in the 1700s just to see where the farmhuse would have been and take a picture if possible...the area is now upmarket houses so I asked someone who enquired about the name... yes he still lives there... the farmhouse was behind trees which were so close I could net get a photograph but I was invited in and the descendants still live there... a document shown to me from the 1700s was an agreement by some Lord and an ancester that as long as there is a descendant in the house they can continue with the lease..
                        I met a new relative who was a person I immediatly liked and visited the address were my mothers surname has been on every census ever taken
                        Last edited by colin taylor; 07-04-11, 11:22.

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                        • #13
                          I have visited a small village where I have tracked family back to 1770s so far and there are still descendants today.
                          We asked for permission to take a photo of the old house from the gate and the elderly couple were so interested in our links to the property. They asked us to contact them if we visited the area again, so we did a few months later ( following up on Record Office information found on 1st visit)... They invited us to visit for a chat at the following weekend.
                          What a welcome. To sit in the room where countless ancestors had sat after a day out in the fields and to see the quarry tiled floor scrubbed so many years by their wives, was great, as we chatted and enjoyed the farmhouse tea and fresh cake prepared for us.
                          The couple really enjoyed chatting about 'the old days' and were interested to hear of my distant family link to themselves.

                          Gwyn

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                          • #14
                            Thanks for the advice it's always good to get a balanced view

                            I think I will go, see the croft which I know my ancestors lived in on the 1911 census, take some photo's and see what happens. I might also see if there is a cemetery with any gravestones

                            Roll on next week

                            Steven

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                            • #15
                              When my Dad's mother died back in 1969, his sister discovered their father's birth certificate which showed he was born in Lulworth, Dorset....I found it strange that they didn't already know that!

                              We used to visit Lulworth Cove many times each year as we love the place, so the next time we were down there my Dad popped into the village Post Office (remember them!) and asked if there were any Slade's still living there. "Oh Yes" was the reply and Dad was given their addresses. Do you think he would go and see if they were relatives of his...no, not him! Mum and I tried to persuade him, but he wouldn't, stubborn as usual. What a plonker!
                              teresa

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                              • #16
                                Oh my heavens. I wish I could lend my dad to you. He did not know much family genealogy except where his mother's family lived. Knocking on doors got him tours of the homes, tea with the owners, copies of house history books. And all he provided was very nosy chat. He would visit the "home village" every few years dragging one of his super embarrassed children with him. We would get another tour (even when the house had changed hands since the last visit). One lady was so accustomed to knocks on her door she had a special panel prepared in the wall to show the mud and stick construction. (very very old cottage with many updates) (I suspect that Dad was not the only one knocking on her door) There was one poor lady (poor not in the $$ sense but in the having to put up with dad sense) who would tell him visit after visit that she knew nothing, had not lived in the village back then, was not related etc etc but made the mistake of always providing a good cuppa english tea. On our last visit back to England OH and I stood on the street taking photos of relation's home. We did not get into trouble when it was row housing on busy streets. But OH had a ggg grandmother who grew up in a very posh home in Kent. The estate had been broken up with more modern posh homes. We wandered in and took the photo. Knocking on the door was out of the question. Tall fence and gate and two nasty dogs kept us back. The barking got the attention of someone in the house who came out glaring at us. OH explained that ggggm had lived in the house in the early 1800s. She recognized the name and with another glare of how dare we went back in. The big laugh was that OH put on his most Canadian accent when usually he uses his English accent when in the UK.:D. So nothing ventured nothing gained. I'm the second owner of our home. If the previous owners children were to ring the door bell to check on their old homestead I would be pleased to show them around to see how we have changed it.
                                Donelda

                                searching for the Berkshire Hobbises, Rowles, Staniford, Rogers, Parkers, Thackhams, Gouts, LeBouviers, Heaphys and Wilsons

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                                • #17
                                  Thanks Theresa and thanks Donelda some more food for thought. I don't want to go all that way and regret anything but I think I will check out the lay of the land first

                                  Steven

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                                  • #18
                                    Well I did it!!!

                                    Stayed on Skye from Monday to Wednesday this week and visted the village of Torrin where some of my Scottish ancestors lived. I asked around and managed to find out that the house my family stayed in the 1790's onwards is still there and there was still an Anderson living there. I managed to get invited in for a wee chat and they confirmed some of my questions and I was able to give them some of my own findings. I did state right from the off that I wasn't looking to bother or hassle anyone. They were pleasant and I found out a couple of bits of information but more importantly I found where I came from and got some cracking photo's. They also pointed me in the direction of the local cemetery unfortunately no headstones but I did find some Anderson graves and therefore know the approximate area where some might be buried.

                                    Really glad I did it and visted Skye and also had the brass neck to knock on a few doors - my wife was mortified but glad for me and my 4 year old got to wander round a grave yard which she thoroughly enjoyed lol

                                    Steven

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                                    • #19
                                      Well done, Steven! Nothing ventured and all that ..... it just shows it is often worth summoning up the courage!

                                      Anne

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                                      • #20
                                        Well done, Steve!

                                        Now I wonder whether I should have been brave enough to knock on that door in Florida!

                                        Christine
                                        Researching: BENNETT (Leics/Birmingham-ish) - incl. Leonard BENNETT in Detroit & Florida ; WARR/WOR, STRATFORD & GARDNER/GARNAR (Oxon); CHRISTMAS, RUSSELL, PAFOOT/PAFFORD (Hants); BIGWOOD, HAYLER/HAILOR (Sussex); LANCASTER (Beds, Berks, Wilts) - plus - COCKS (Spitalfields, Liverpool, Plymouth); RUSE/ROWSE, TREMEER, WADLIN(G)/WADLETON (Devonport, E Cornwall); GOULD (S Devon); CHAPMAN, HALL/HOLE, HORN (N Devon); BARRON, SCANTLEBURY (Mevagissey)...

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