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Affair?? where do I start?

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  • Affair?? where do I start?

    ok, before I start. I want to say. I cannot talk to my gran about this. She is in a resthome and not mentally well (she is dementia and imagines things and you can't talk to her properly. :()
    I think she has had this mental illness for a while, so I don't know what she told my mum is all true.
    But anyway, she is German. And she told my mum that waaaaay back in our history, a king had an affair with a maid. Mum says about 1800's?
    I'd like to know if this is true, cause it would be awesome to find out if i'm related to Royalty.
    I do not know where to start. I don't live in Germany and I have no contact with any of my relatives (they have nothing to do with us)
    it's just me and my real mum and stepdad. My mum only knows what my nan told her, but my mum is older now and she gets worn out easily and has memory problems :emb:. So I don't want to ask her if she knows if she has any papers ( I think she had some papers?). Plus, our house has a LOT of stuff in it. Mum is always stressed and says she doesn't want to go through all her wardrobes looking for photos (I asked her for our old photos from the early 1900's of my relatives)
    So, I'm a newbie at this stuff. So I wondering if someone can help me start?


    p.s: I forgot to say, my real dad is a violent person and evil ( don't want to get into the story). So I can't ask him.
    I have this wiki page of Germany Monarchy as well
    German monarchs family tree - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    I only know of the last name 'fehse' going back in our history (my great grandparents last name I believe) and another one (which I forgot)

    thank you:tong::Wink:
    i'm the guardian, im the sole protector, of a heart that has been abused- THE GUARDIAN by Delta Goodrem

  • #2
    Hi - not sure what names you have - but for starters, could these be related?
    Marriages Sep 1891
    Fehse August Otto E Sunderland 10a 889

    Marriages Sep 1891
    Bockmann Anna Dorette S A Sunderland 10a 889
    Brown Mary Jane Sunderland 10a 889
    Burnley John William Sunderland 10a 889
    Fehse August Otto E Sunderland 10a 889

    Marriages Sep 1914
    De Kerlor Willy Schiaparelli St.Martin 1a 1368
    Fehse Klara H Neumann St.Martin 1a 1368
    Neumann David Fehse St.Martin 1a 1368
    Neumann David Winkler St.Martin 1a 1368
    SCHIAPARELLI Elsa L M De Kerlor St. Martin 1a 1368
    WINKLER Klara H Neumann St. Martin 1a 1368

    Bit of confusion with the Klara names...perhaps she had married before?
    Came from this site - FreeBMD - Search

    To go back in time, you probably need to trace back in the UK first to then get your search back to Germany....

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    • #3
      The only way is to work backwards proving each ancestors as you go until you get back to when it alledgedly happened. However I don't know how good German genealogy resources are.

      There was a thread awhile ago about family stories handed down and what people had found out when they'd researched it.



      Researching Irish families: FARMER, McBRIDE McQUADE, McQUAID, KIRK, SANDS/SANAHAN (Cork), BARR,

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      • #4
        I have been working with people suffering from dementia for 20 years +, there are a couple of things to remember, that some can have delusional ideas with grandiose flavours, especially in the earlier stages. Some can pick up ideas ffrom the TV and in the short term relate them to their own lives, again more likely to be observed in the earlier stages of the illness, and lastly although short term memory is usually poor, long term memory is less impaired.
        I would not give up on your Mum, but may have to be discovered over a period of time. People with memory or mental health problems can be overwhelmed with the thought of significant changes to their routine or upset in their environment., it maybe more a case of gentle coaxing and making her think it's her idea. In most cases, people love to talk about their younger lives and their memories, if you can get on that track, maybe just throw in the idea of looking out photo's or just asking if she has any pictures relating to what you are talking about.

        Like JBee says it's a case of working backwards, and be prepared never to know. There is a similar story in our family, as I have resaerched there is increasing evidence that there may be some truth in our 'myth' but I still haven't reached that elusive piece of tangible evidence to prove it.

        Good luck
        Bubblebelle x

        FAMILY INTERESTS: Pitts of Sherborne Gloucs. Deaney (Bucks). Pye of Kent. Randolph of Lydd, Kent. Youell of Norfolk and Suffolk. Howe of Lampton. Carden of Bucks.

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        • #5
          I'm not sure there is going to be ANY record of a King having an affair with a maidservant anyway - that sort of situation would be officially suppressed I am sure.

          However, as the others have said, you need to work back in a systematic manner, to find the maidservant, if nothing else!

          OC

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          • #6
            Originally posted by bubblebelle View Post
            I have been working with people suffering from dementia for 20 years +, there are a couple of things to remember, that some can have delusional ideas with grandiose flavours, especially in the earlier stages. Some can pick up ideas ffrom the TV and in the short term relate them to their own lives, again more likely to be observed in the earlier stages of the illness, and lastly although short term memory is usually poor, long term memory is less impaired.
            I would not give up on your Mum, but may have to be discovered over a period of time. People with memory or mental health problems can be overwhelmed with the thought of significant changes to their routine or upset in their environment., it maybe more a case of gentle coaxing and making her think it's her idea. In most cases, people love to talk about their younger lives and their memories, if you can get on that track, maybe just throw in the idea of looking out photo's or just asking if she has any pictures relating to what you are talking about.

            Like JBee says it's a case of working backwards, and be prepared never to know. There is a similar story in our family, as I have resaerched there is increasing evidence that there may be some truth in our 'myth' but I still haven't reached that elusive piece of tangible evidence to prove it.

            Good luck
            thanks everyone.
            Thing is, you can't 'talk' to her. She lives in another area and you can't talk normally to her. She doesn't understand :xmas_frown:
            i'm the guardian, im the sole protector, of a heart that has been abused- THE GUARDIAN by Delta Goodrem

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            • #7
              Perhaps you can just start working backwards...you'll be surprised at the info you can find.

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              • #8
                Listen to what she does say, my mother was chuntering about her brother - she is an only child. No, we uncovered a brother born & died years before she was
                Jess

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