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Another strange thing in my tree.

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  • Another strange thing in my tree.

    Sorry if this rambles...

    This isn't something I need people to search for, but rather just give me any ideas.

    My gg grandmother, Phoebe Martin was born 1817, Hastings, Sussex (according to her death cert and shipping record)

    She married Benjamin Mepham 16th Oct 1835, Heathfield Sussex. True from PRs.

    Son, Benjamin born Dec, 1835, Heathfield. This is a submitted entry, but matches his age on his death cert.

    The three of them came to Australia in 1839.

    Next record is the birth of Phoebe's 2nd child Jane in 1844. The father is John Nation.
    There are a further 6 children up to 1856. John Nation dies 1859.

    I cannot find a death for Benjamin Mepham(husband) until 1883, or a marriage for Phoebe and John Nation.
    I'm sure the 1883 death is her 1st husband.

    Now.....here's my odd bit...

    My great grandmother was Phoebe and John's 6th and 2nd last child.
    Her birth cert has John for her father, but she is named
    Amelia Mepham Nation.

    Why would a woman name the 6th child with second partner after the 1st husband who seems to be still alive????????????

  • #2
    Deliberate bigamy - a ménage à trois?
    Uncle John - Passed away March 2020

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    • #3
      Because her mother's name was Mrs Mepham!

      Nowadays we would double-barrel it and she would be Amelia Mepham-Nation, but they don't appear to have known about the hyphen back then!

      OC

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      • #4
        UJ..............I did think of that, but quickly put it to the back of my mind.....lol

        After John Nation died she did go on to marry a third time. Properly marry, I mean, with cert.
        I wonder if she used John Nation's death to "prove" she was a widow for that marriage.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Olde Crone Holden View Post
          Because her mother's name was Mrs Mepham!

          Nowadays we would double-barrel it and she would be Amelia Mepham-Nation, but they don't appear to have known about the hyphen back then!

          OC


          OC.......that was true!!!!!!

          Everytime I open this tree, I hear my grandmother telling me about "bad" girls and keeping "pure till marriage" lol Even she didn't marry till Mum was 27!!

          We despair of own children...lol nearly saints compared to this lot.

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          • #6
            You didn't have to produce proof that you were widowed when you married again. You could say you were, or that you were single and still have a prior spouse living elsewhere.

            I don't think human beings have ever been saintly and I'm not sure why so many people expect their ancestors to be pure. Without a lot of illicit sex none of us would be here as I am sure we all have illegitimacy in our families. The Royal Family and the nobility have set a bad example through the years too.
            ~ with love from Little Nell~
            Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

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            • #7
              Nell.....................I'm not really worried about their morals or lack of......I just can't work out why a woman would name a child she had with one partner after another still living partner.

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              • #8
                Did any of the other children have the Mepham Nation name too?
                My avatar is my Great Grandmother Emma Gumbert

                Sue at Langley Vale

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                • #9
                  No Sue..............only that one.

                  When I first found all this, I thought maybe Benjamin Mepham was Amelia's fatehr and Phoebe had been expecting her when she "married" John Nation and then named her after her father. After I started researching properly I realised she was the 6th child of Phoebe and John.

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                  • #10
                    Is the middle name Mepham actually on her birth cert? It isn't in the birth index.

                    I see she has the middle name Nippen in the marriage index, which is presumably a mistranscription of Mepham.

                    Maybe she fell out with John, was in contact with her mother's first husband, and decided to adopt his name for some reason?

                    Or maybe Phoebe and Benjamin got back together for a while.

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                    • #11
                      Hi Mary,

                      The middle name is Mepham on her baptism cert with John as the father. I have that.

                      Yes, the Nippen, Meppen, Meffen are all hers......lol

                      I can't see Phoebe getting back with Ben as she's named John as Amelia's father then had another child to John a couple of years later.

                      I also, can't see a man having a child named after his "wife's" first husband, when he was still alive????

                      He would have known Mepham was her married name as she had her first born with her whose surname was Mepham. Unless John thought she was unmarried with baby Ben and Mepham was her maiden name.???

                      Mysteries....................

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                      • #12
                        Maybe Amelia was brought up for the first few years of her life as Mepham? If she hadn't married the second partner, maybe she had to pretend the baby was legitimate for a while? Then, when the child got older and she could openly live with the second partner, rather than just tear away a name the child had grown up with, just add the 'new' name?

                        Maybe if she gave Amelia her husband's name, she was more likely to inherit or just less likely to be discriminated against? Then, later on, it might have become less important?

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