ideas on how to find half siblings

[yummy-mummy-amy]

hi,

have you got any ideas as to how i could find 1 definate and 1 possible half sibling.

my friend has asked me to try and help her find her half brother(s). she doesnt know much about them only the name, and even then she isn't even sure IF they had her dads surname or the mothers name. she knows the area of birth and that they were the result of an affair.

i do know that this is a total stab in the dark.

[Margaret in Burton]

I would imagine that the only way would be to search the GRO indexes under both names until they are found.

[Mary from Italy]

If she knows the Christian name and approximate year of birth, you can trawl through the complete index on Ancestry looking under the father's surname.

However, if he was registered with the mother's surname (which is very likely) and you don't know it, you won't be able to find him, because the index is registered by surname.

[BigShaz McCreadie]

Hi Amy

If the people you are looking for were born from 1984 onwards then you can search under either name.

I have been able to search for my children under both surnames.

[yummy-mummy-amy]

no they were born before 1975 but after 1964. i know it doesnt narrow it down by much.

my friend knows about the siblings, doesnt know if they know about her etc, she knows she could be opening a can of worms but wants to take that risk IF we can find them. she has asked me as she knows i wont take money from her or give her false info etc. i have been honest with her that "yes i have done my tree, but i dont claim to be an expert", which is why i said i would ask for help and advice on here. i intend to try and help her as best as i can.

[Mary from Italy]

Does your friend know the mother's surname, Amy?

[yummy-mummy-amy]

no, her dad had an affair and her mum told her there is 1 definate child from it and 1 possible child. so we dont know if they were registered under her dads surname of the lady the affair was with surname.

[Mary from Italy]

Well, as I said before, you could try searching under the father's surname, but if you don't find anything, you're going to be stuck.

And even if you do find something with the right father's surname at roughly the right place and time, you can't be sure it's the right father without buying the cert, and unless the name's an unusual one, it could come very expensive.

[tinkerbe]

i would also like to surgest a search thought facebook bebo and freinds and genes reuntied and a google search

and your friend puting her birth name on these in case they are looking for her

[yummy-mummy-amy]

i wouldnt say the surname is common, but that doesnt mean anything. she is happy to buy as many certs as she needs to, but i have told her that even IF we did hit gold with a cert it doesnt mean that the person is still living.

[maggie_4_7]

I think unless you find out the mother's surname you're onto a no winner to be honest.

I think the only approach is finding out as much as you can about the mother her christian name even or best her surname her family or where she came from and where she lived.

I was registered in my fathers name but that wasn't the norm to be honest but I suppose you could look for them under their father's name in the first instance.

[Kit]

Is there any chance she could ask her father, Amy? I just think it is unlikely the children are registered under his name unless he took responsibility for them.

[Melancholy]

Hello.

This is my first post here, but I thought I would add to this thread, as it seems to fit my own query.

I am UK based, but was unsure whether the majority of people who use this site are from the UK or not??

Basically, I have a half sister whom I've never met before (although I have seen pictures of her many years ago). We share the same father, although I believe my half sister is not in contact with him, and think she only met him a few times when she was a child. I don't think she ever had any kind of relationship with him. I don't see my father either, and therefore cannot extract any information from that source (his preference, not mine). There is nobody else I am able to ask about this.

I have obtained my half sister's birth certificate, but from thereon in, I am stuck. I know her birth name, but she did not take on my father's surname, so the birth certificate shows her surname as that of her mothers'. I expect she she would be married by now. I have put her name into google, looked on 192.com, and checked out the usual sites such as Friends Reunited, Facebook and My Space, all to no avail.

Does anyone have any information on how I can trace my half sister? I am more than aware that she may not be interested in finding out about me, but that is a risk I am prepared to take. She would be 40 years old by now, and I am 38, so I feel the years have slipped by, and I really would like to try to make contact before either of us pass away (although she may have already, for all I know).

The birth certificate obviously gives me her birth name, her date of birth, her mother's name (whom incidentally, I have also checked the usual sites with, and come back with nothing), and where she was born. However, I feel that because it is looking likely her surname has changed, along with her mother's, there is becoming little chance of me ever finding her.

If anyone has any ideas of how I would go about tracing my half sister from this point onwards, I would be extremely grateful. My family is completely dysfunctional, and therefore I find myself with dozens of questions that have remained unanswered for decades. Now, I feel, is the time to do something about that, but unfortunately, it seems it has to be on my own stead.

I would appreciate any help.

Thank you in advance.

Melancholy.

[Night Owl]

Welcome to the site.

Ancestry now has England and Wales marriage registers transcribed up to 2005. You could start by looking for likely marriages. (Unless you're talking about Scotland).

Obviously it will be easier if the surname is unusual. It might be better to see if the mother remarried first just in case your half sister took any new surname she may have.

If you don't have Ancestry, many local libraries have free access or you could take out a 14 free trial (just Google Ancestry free trial)

[Darksecretz]

Some very sound advice there Jackie, and Yes Melancholy.. we are a UK based site, primarily with UK members but do have members from all over the world,

you could try looking at electoral rolls (usually held at the local archives to the event) from the birth of sister and see how long they stayed at that address and also it may be that the mother remarried and stayed at the address in question, it might also be worthwhile looking in local newpapers again in the same area to see if there were any births/marriages/deaths recorded, as sometimes you can find out snippits of info regarding other family members.

I hope this helps.

[Melancholy]

Thank you for your prompt replies, and useful information.

I don't have a debit or credit card unfortunately, so I think the Ancestry option is out, since i think they take your bank details even for the free trial, don't they?

The surname is not common, which is fortunate. It would seem as though I will have to take a few days away at some point to visit the area local to where she lived. That's a scary thought in itself!

I appreciate your time and quick responses. Thank you.

Melancholy.

[margaretmarch]

Thank you for your prompt replies, and useful information.

I don't have a debit or credit card unfortunately, so I think the Ancestry option is out, since i think they take your bank details even for the free trial, don't they?

The surname is not common, which is fortunate. It would seem as though I will have to take a few days away at some point to visit the area local to where she lived. That's a scary thought in itself!

I appreciate your time and quick responses. Thank you.

Melancholy.

If you would like to send a private message with the details to me I will look up the marriage index for your names.
Margaret

[Melancholy]

That's very decent of you, Margaretmarch. Thank you. I'm a little embarrassed though, because I'm very new at this, and don't know how to send a private message! Please could you advise me how I do this, and also the exact details you would need? I don't have the mother's date of birth, only her name, but I have my half sister's birth name and date of birth (and place of birth, if that helps). Any details on either the mother or daughter would be beneficial and a good starting point, I suppose.

Thank you very much in advance for your kindness.

Melancholy.

[Mary from Italy]

You just click on someone's name to send them a private message.

If you want to look at Ancestry yourself, your local library or record office will probably offer free access.

I don't suppose either you or your half-sister were adopted? If so, social services should be able to help.

[Melancholy]

Hello Mary from Italy

Thank you for your post.

I wasn't adopted, but I know very little about my half sister, other than her birth name and her mother's name at the time my half sister was born.

I have been trying to do a bit of research via the internet, but many threads regarding half siblings are, in fact, in connection with adoptive half siblings, which I don't think applies in my case (unless my half sister was adopted as a child, in which case perhaps I'll never know!).