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finding graves of great grandparents

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  • finding graves of great grandparents

    hi everyone,

    my gran is very interested in where her parents were buried. we have a friend of the family in england now, who is looking at the grave of a different great grandma and her parents.

    problem is, my family nows nothing of these people. so i'll give you what i know, and maybe someone can help.

    great nan lily beatrice coates. married joseph edward dove in 1920. she died in 1964, darlington. there's a family story about her death, but i dont have the cert yet. someone told me, that she was called lillian in the obits, and my pop was annoyed because her name was lily.

    great granpa joseph. married lily in 1920. died nov 1973, felixstowe, suffolk.
    grans sister was betty dove, she married perfecto burgess. she died in 1996.
    at first we thought she may have been buried with joseph, but a cousin doesn't think so.

    is there a way to find out where they are buried? my gran is really interested, and an aunt is pretty desperate to know as well. you guys know how to find everything, maybe someone can help?:o

  • #2
    Hi,

    You could try this site - Gravestone Photographic Resource Project home page -there seems to be more for Suffolk than for some counties
    Last edited by Muggins in Sussex; 31-08-08, 11:11.
    Joan died in July 2020.

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    • #3
      I would think that at these sort of dates they would be likely to have been buried in cemeteries rather than churchyards, so perhaps an approach to the local councils might bring some information?

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      • #4
        If they were buried in a churchyard they would be in the relevant parish burial register.

        Cemeteries and crematoria keep their own records. Some of these are free to search online but some charge to search.

        People aren't always buried where you'd expect. My gt grandfather died in north London but was taken - during WW1 - to Norfolk to be buried with his wife, who'd died 9 years earlier. I don't know if it was by car, horse and cart, or on a train, but it would have been a tricky journey.
        ~ with love from Little Nell~
        Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

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        • #5
          Sometimes the local paper would have a death notice which would give details of the funeral.
          ~ with love from Little Nell~
          Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

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          • #6
            Nell - I think it was quite usual to transport a coffin by train. My Dad worked on the railways (1939-1980) and I remember him mentioning it. Also My granny (Dad's mother) was taken from York to Bedfordshire by train for burial with her late husband - that was in 1966.

            Anne

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            • #7
              Well, this was 1917, so not sure, especially as there was a war on, what the train service was like.

              I imagine it would have gone from Finchley to Liverpool street, somehow, and then to Norwich and finally Cantley, where they had a 2-mile trip to the churchyard.
              ~ with love from Little Nell~
              Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

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              • #8
                my gran said that they wern't buried together, because it was too expensive to transport him to durham, for burial with great nanna

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                • #9
                  Hi Kylejustin,

                  If you know which area your relative died then I agree with Roger in Sussex. I approached Sheffield City Council regarding my G Granfather, I had a lovely e mail back telling me which cemetery he was buried in and the plot number, there was even a map of the cemetery to help me find the right spot.

                  I am not saying that every City Council will respond in the same way but it is worth a try. You will need to give them as much information as possible to help them trace the person.

                  Good luck

                  Hartist

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                  • #10
                    I have been extremely lucky with all the cemeteries that I have approached. If you go to the relevant county's website which will be something like Welcome to Darlington Borough Council there will be a section for cemeteries and you can email them.
                    Bo

                    At present: Marshall, Smith, Harding, Whitford, Lane (in and around Winchcomb).

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                    • #11
                      Joseph Edward Dove died in 1972, not 1973:

                      Deaths, Oct-Nov-Dec 1972
                      Dove, Joseph Edward, ABOUT 1893, Samford, 4b 2917

                      Whoever registered the death evidently didn't know his exact date of birth, hence the "ABOUT 1893".


                      And here is Betty's death. Different registration district, but as mentioned above - that doesn't necessarily mean that they weren't buried in the same place:

                      Name: Betty Burgess
                      Birth Date: 6 Apr 1925
                      Death Registration Month/Year: Jan 1996
                      Registration district: Ipswich
                      Register number: D16B
                      District and Subdistrict: 7471D
                      Entry Number: 105
                      Last edited by Richard in Perth; 01-09-08, 03:43.

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                      • #12
                        Births of Lily & Joseph:

                        Births Jun 1890
                        Coates Lily Beatrice Auckland 10a 206

                        Births Mar 1893
                        Dove Joseph Edward Darlington 10a 22

                        ... their marriage (1921, not 1920). Lily's surname is mispelt in the index:

                        Marriages Mar 1921
                        Cates Lily B Dove Darlington 10a 48
                        Dove Joseph E Cates Darlington 10a 48

                        ... and Lily's death (was registered as Lily, not Lillian):

                        Deaths, Jul-Aug-Sep 1964
                        Dove, Lily B, 74, Darlington, 1a 210
                        Last edited by Richard in Perth; 01-09-08, 04:05.

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                        • #13
                          I think it would be a good idea to get the death certs for the people whose graves you seek before approaching the local council cemetery people. The exact date of death will make their job much easier

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                          • #14
                            thanx guys and thanx richard.

                            when i meant as 'lillian', i meant the newspapers called her that. and i know that her surname was misspelled on her marriage.

                            and im sorry for not being exact with the dates, i didn't have my notes in front of me.

                            by the way, where did you get the death info? i couldn'tfind it on ancestry or freebmd. though durham council had lily for 1864

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                            • #15
                              i sent an email to darlington council. they replied to tell me that lily was cremated, gave me the date and told me when and where she died too.
                              it was really cool to know. now, ill email suffolk, or is felixstowe in norfolk?

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                              • #16
                                Felixstowe is in Suffolk
                                Bo

                                At present: Marshall, Smith, Harding, Whitford, Lane (in and around Winchcomb).

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                                • #17
                                  i've emailed suffolk. fingers crossed they can help me!!

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                                  • #18
                                    I thought I would share my recent experience re finding graves. I know some of it has already been covered but some tips may be helpful.

                                    Most major cities have several municipal graveyards and depending on the home address or sometimes place of death ie a hospital they usually fall into a catchment area for one particular cemetery. In the early 1900's church grave yards began to be full so a lot of major cities started large 'municiple' cemeteries.
                                    Religion can also play a big part and if a person wanted to be buried with her family or the family owned a plot. EG in Liverpool they have Yew Tree Cemetery that caters for Catholics and many Irish Catholics
                                    I am no expert but my recent experience searching in Liverpool was quite easy. You will find a list of cemeteries on the local council website. I emailed the Central Library Records Office with the details and asked for advice and you will find that they hold the records. I was lucky that they had most records on a data base. I got an email back with details of SEVEN relatives in 2 graves. They gave me the sections (ie 4c) and the grave numbers (ie 228)
                                    I then googled the cemetery name for a map and a local history site had one. You should find the section and grave numbers etched on the back of the headstones... this is really helpfull. The numbers are not always in sequence as some people bought a 'nice spot' in advance.
                                    Remember that if a person dies alone they may not have a headstone or may be in a family grave but may not be listed on the grave stone.
                                    If visiting, wear flat shoes and take a digital camera and a bunch of flowers... my heels kept getting stuck It was raining and I never thought about taking flowers.. typical bloke eh.
                                    John

                                    Brick wall in Ireland demolished after 25 years! Looking for any more Carrolls of Stradbally Parish, Waterford in particular Thomas Carroll b1861 married Bridget Leavy 1896 in QLD Australia..chipping away!

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                                    • #19
                                      suffolk councils keep bumming me off to each other. i don't know if i'll ever find his grave. he's been very difficult to locate, unlike lily, who i found in no time when i asked the council.

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