Unconfigured Ad Widget

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

A Victim of Shocking Cruelty or an 19th Century Bulimiac?

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • A Victim of Shocking Cruelty or an 19th Century Bulimiac?

    Got bit of a shock today when browsing using the free trial at Gale Newspaper Archives, entered my families name but no hits, so I decided to enter the Street they were living on Seabright Street, Bethnal Green to get a feel for the area. What came up nearly knocked me for six...seven or eight articles from London/Manchester/Edinburgh/Glasgow one even in Welsh all reporting the death of my 3 x Great Grandmother. They have her name down as Julia Susannah Bellinger, though it was actualy Julia Sarah Bellenger, it is definently her though as I knew the Quarter of her death, the adress is right, and lots of the famiy are named.


    Here's the shocking bit she appears to have been abandoned by her husband, and then starved to death by her own mother!


    Though there was plenty of deaths from starvation in Bethnal Green at this time, hers really did hit the news, front page in one case, was deemed 'the strange case of starvation of Bethnal Green' because her mother was by local standards fairly well off.


    I've read and reread the reports trying to understand then why on Earth her mother would treat her like this. My first thoughts, much influenced by the coroner of the case, was she must have just been an evil old cow..but I really am beginning to wonder if it was that simple, whether there wasn't more to it than meets the eye?


    The coroner said it was by far the worse case of emaciation he had ever seen, she was a virtual skeleton, and her stomach and intestines completely empty. Julias daugter seems to be the one mainly pointing the finger at granny, saying she took her starving mother a bit of meat and sausage roll, but granny snatched it away and gave it to the little brother. She then gave her some wine, and granny grumbled at the 'waste'. She then aked granny to have the fire on as her mother was cold and shivering, and she told her she would not 'it was her house she'd do as she pleased in it, and nobody had the right to tell her otherwise'. The Doctor also seems to point the finger at Granny, she refused to call a doctor because they were 'too expensive', and when a neighbour did call a free parish doctor in (after Julia had been in a coma for 3 days and which theyd been entitled to all along in any case), granny grumbled at him to not to 'waste his medicine on her', though he put her in her place clearly.


    In the coroners inquest she seems to have done herself no favours, more or less refusing to answer their questions, telling them it was her business not their and telling them they shouldn't insult her. The coroner called her 'impertenent' and seems to have been utterly disgusted by the women, especially the fact she went on holiday 'to the sea side' for 3 months to Ramsgate and left her daughter 2 Pence a day to live on during that whole time.


    Open and shut case of cruelty? Thing is if she really disliked her daughter that much why have her in the house at all? Why leave her any money? And grandaughter actually admits granny was kind to Julia (where it didn't hurt her pocket), cooked her a sunday dinner every weekend and fed her meat during the week.


    For the final hearing two weeks later my 3x great grandad suddenly appears as he had read in the paper his daughter had said he makes a puond a week, and he wanted to make it clear he earned only 15 shillings. He claimed he had no knowledge his wife was in such need. They'd split up 7 years earlier, after she had become obsessed with jealousy towards a younger girl next door. Though he had indeed since moved in with another lady and had a child, he wanted to make clear also it was not the same woman, who was a married lady. He had in fact split with his wife as they'd never really been happy, and she wished him to break ties with all his old connections even his mother.


    Though the coroner clearly didn't think much of the husbands testimony either, one thing he did say stuck in my mind..she was always skeletal, even though she ate enough for 'three men'. Granny was recalled and though it may be because she was perhaps now worried about charges being bought, she now claimed she fed her daughter a meal daily. Coupled with the fact even the daughter admitted she was at very least regularly fed sunday dinner and meat during the week, why was she SO emaciated, no food in her body whatsoever?


    Of course I can't really know the truth, but I am wondering whether the husband and mothers comments point instead to someone with bulimia?
    Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 19:14.

  • #2
    Anorexia much more likely, Richard - Bulimics make themselves vomit after gorging on food, anorexics don't intake the food in the first place, although they are often very skilled at APPEARING to eat a meal.

    I remember in the 60s, before Anorexia and Bulimia had ever been heard of, the wife of a wealthy Hotelier where we lived, "starved to death". It was the end of this man's very successful hotel and the end of him too.

    Looking back, this woman could not possibly have starved to death by anyone else's hand other than her own - she had free run of the hotel and its kitchens and often presided over the Dining Room.

    In your case, perhaps the mother was infuriated by her daughter's seeming laziness, thinking "she'll get out of bed when she's hungry". If the daughter had always been a bit odd about food then perhaps the situation just crept up on them all.

    On the other hand, the dynamics of anorexia are very complex and the mother in this case sounds a manipulative and domineering woman, who might have gained great pleasure from playing russian roulette with her daughter's life.

    A very sad story which reflects no glory on anyone concerned.

    OC

    Comment


    • #3
      In defense of the mother (grandmother), though not sure I should be trying to defend her, she was 78 at the time. Her husband had died, bankrupt a prisoner in the debtors prison 2 years previous. She says to the coroner her 'wealth' an 'annuinity' of 500 pounds per year, was being extremely exageratted, her husband had left her destitute and she had had to go to court to reclaim his estate, and though sucessful, had been saddled with lots of solicitors fees and hidden costs etc.

      The coroner had clearly lost his patience with her by this point and told her not to speak nonesense it was clear to all she was well off and could have provided for her daughter.
      However I know from my own preious research she was actually telling the absolute truth there, so he was biased against her.

      It is true her behaviour looks appaling, maybe was, but perhaps she felt her daughters own behaviour had caused the break down of the marriage, and resented her for then turning upon her doorstep with her young children , and blamed the stress of this for her own husbands recent death?

      Why I think Bulimia is because of the husbands comment about her eating for three, but sitll appearing skeletal for years, and the incosistant fact all others agree she did take meals, with some regularity. Also the jealousy towards this next door neighbour, which if hubby is to be believed was totally misplaced, and the desire to control his movements and contacts, suggests someone maybe with an emotional/obsessive issue?

      Of course if it was bulimia or another eating disorder it would not have been recognised as such perhaps why the family were so unsympathetic as you point out OC.

      Julia herself seems to have said conflicting things to conflicting people. To her daughter she said she was 'starving' but would rather 'starve to death at her mothers, than go in the workhouse'. Yet when her youngest son Eugene, who was 16, gave evidence he claimed his mother had never once mentioned to him she was 'starving'. Now unlike the others he doesn't seem to have any motive to lie. His sister in her evidence praised him as the only one apart from herself doing anything for their mother, he gave her a shilling a week, whereas her eldest son George, who was rich and lived in chelsea would not help her at all. However Eugene even contradicted this, saying he gave nearly his entire wages 8 shillings to his mother keeping a few pence for himself. He reckoned at most his keep was 2-3 shilling, so she would have had plenty to buy food for herself. So either Julia had lied to her daughter about that (who was married and didnt live with them) or Eugene is lying, which I just don't see.

      One more comment may be significant. Granny said Julia near the end of the 'ilness' would no longer take food, but would take beer or wine but she didn't think it 'right to give her that sort of nourishment'. I wonder whether alcohol was a factor?
      Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 20:31.

      Comment


      • #4
        One wonders why George who was rich, didn't help at all. Suggests complete emotional detachment from his mother - perhaps he was fed up of her games??

        Perhaps Eugene was telling the truth about handing over his wages and Julia was quietly drinking it? Or maybe worse - opium and laudanum both suppress the appwtite, although usage of these drugs would propbably have been noticed by the family and detected by the post mortem.

        Not too impressed by the husband's evidence - he has an interest in making himself appear in a good light - maybe his wife was completely justified in her jealousy. Eating for three is an odd thing to say though, as that would make him appear even worse in not providing for her financially.

        It sounds as if mother and daughter both had mental health issues.

        As it happens, I have just been re-reading Road to Nab End and the granny in that starved to death literally, rather than go into the Workhouse. She did however live alone. Her extended family were aware of her plight but were so starved themselves that they could not help her. She would not accept charity from a soup kitchen.

        OC

        Comment


        • #5
          Richard.

          What an awful thing to discover:(

          I suppose all of us researching our family trees must be prepared to uncover things that arent very nice
          Pam

          Comment


          • #6
            Perhaps this is why I'm trying so hard to justify the grandmothers role, because it seems very strange not just her own mothers seemingly abominable behaviour, but also the apparant total indifference of at least one of her sons. Strangely it says she had 12 children, 'none of whom would help'. That's not true. She married at 18, had 8 children, 3 of whom died in infancy, so only had five at that time. They were George 26, Julia 24, William 17, Eugene 16, and Gerrard 13.


            I may just be able to believe the husband, George (sr) was indeed skirt chasing, because Eugene eventually went on to do much the same, her married 2 years after this had 11 kids then on reaching 40 (exactly the same age his father was when his marriage broke up) chucked his wife and kids and went to live with a girl ten years younger up the road. Then by the time the next census he has done the dirty one her also and is living with another girl this time twenty years younger. I'll have to wait until 2012 to see if he did it again before 1911!


            Also he (George) says he kept the two children who needed supporting and left his wife with only those who he felt would support her. The census show this is total nonesense, when they split he kept George the oldest, and William (my 2xg g), ie both the working age boys, the daughter and the two younger boys he left with her, the complete opposite. He therefore lied about at least that. Despite this her daughter (who clearly did believe he was to blame) did say though Julia chose never to sue her husband as she was still extremelly fond of him right up to her death.
            Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 21:08.

            Comment


            • #7
              Thanks Pam

              Is a shock..still trying to get my head round it all really.

              Comment


              • #8
                A horrid shock to discover.

                Granny sounds a bit unhinged.

                There was a famous trial in 1877 of a man, his mistress, his brother and brother's wife for the murder of Harriet Staunton, starved to death. The defence was that Harriet was diseased rather than starved and I suppose its possible that TB (wasting disease) or cachexia (extreme wasting usually caused by cancer) might have been responsible for a death that appeared to be starvation.
                ~ with love from Little Nell~
                Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

                Comment


                • #9
                  Yes, I was wondering that - or she might have had some kind of malabsorption syndrome. Odd that Granny didn't want the doctor, though.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    "Granny sounds a bit unhinged"

                    This is what I was thinking, but at 78 she'd been through a lot in the last five years, her daughters marriage had broken up and she'd come to live with them with 3 kids to feed, then her husbands goes bankrupt, ends up in the debtors prison and dies a few month later. Then she has to go through a long legal battle to get his estate back. Perhaps it all had an effect on the mind of a woman that age and for some reason her daughter became to 'blame' for it in her mind? Definently her treatment seems bizarre, at times kind, cooking her sunday dinners, then refusing to even let her warm herself at the fire. Even the going down for 3 months to Ramsgate alone seems strange. on 1861 census she is there with her husband..I wonder whether both mother and daughter were having some sort of breakdown, her from greif of losing her husband, daughter depression at breakdown of her marriage. That combination ending in tragedy.

                    The coroner claimed apart from slight asthma she was in fine health, just totally and utterly emaciated to a degree he'd never experienced before.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Regarding comments about Julia's drinking - alcohol can suppress the appetite and lead to malnutrition.
                      ~ with love from Little Nell~
                      Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        It would certainly go some way towards explaining, though not condoning, the mothers behaviour, and the elder sons indifference if that was the case. But surely the coroner would have noted signs of alcohol abuse, and I get the feeling hubby George would have jumped at the chance to blame his desertion on her drinking given half the chance, perhaps telling then he didn't.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Of course granny might have had Alzheimer's or early dementia at 78.

                          Yes, horrible when you turn over a stone in your family and find something you weren't prepared to find.

                          OC

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Actually OC yes...she certainly does sound consistent with that. She clearly didn't feel she'd done anything wrong at the Inquest, and seems put out by them like she genuinly felt 'she' was the victim in it all. Sadly I have had some experience of dementia, and that individual did behave very much like that, and genuinely didn't seem to understand her 'bad' behaviour and why everyone seemed to be picking on her. I'd not considered that but perhaps your right.

                            Thing is I'm wondering where my great-great grandad William was in all this. When the couple split he was 9, and remained with his dad and older brother. He would only have been a year older than Eugene, 17, when she died, so maybe, unlike George the oldest, could be forgiven for not providing help either?

                            George, the rich brother, I believe did not ever reconcile himself with his siblings, he emigrated to Canada in 1882. The father George died not long after Julia, in 1870, young too (just sent for the cert hope its not more bad news!) When he died William, now 21, seems to have been reconciled with his siblings and he went to live with sister Julia and youngest brother Gerrard.

                            He initially went to work with Eugene together as milk men, and they took holidays in Yorkshire to visit Eugenes wifes relations. Funnily enough though it was Eugene who seems the angel here..who ended up the 'black sheep' for his previously mentioned behaviour to his wives. When 'granny' eventually died in 1877, my g-g grandad suddenly has the funds to ditch the milkman game, leave Bethnal Green and bought his own pub in Stratford. Gerrard went with him, but sadly died young two years later. Sister Julia later joined him and they remained very close until they both died in their 70's...neither seem to have ever reconciled with Eugene, he remained a milkman in Bethnal Green into his 70's, though his youngest son Captain Fred Bellenger went on to become quite a famous Cabinet minister in his time!

                            Since Julia was her mothers greatest defender at the Inquest, and ended up closest to William, I'm hoping that means his behaviour in the whole affair was not bad, even if he seems not to have helped, perhaps he was still too young really to know or appreciate the seriousness of what was happening? He is certainly remembered well in my family and it would seem very much out of charachter.
                            Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 22:29.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              How awful!!

                              Several things could have happened, Grannie could have had senile dementia, so may have thought she was feeding Julia, or that she was eating, when she wasn't.

                              Julia could have been severely depressed after the breakdown of her marriage, & slowly staved herself to death; even eating a roast dinner once a week, over several months that wouldn't have been enough to live on.

                              Julia may have had a wasting disease, such as consumption, or even diabetes or some other undiagnosed illness.

                              She may have had some kind of parasitic infestation; such as tapeworm (sorry lol) or other nasties that could cause weight loss (she ate for 3 men, could indicate worms)

                              Very sad whatever the cause,

                              Joanie

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                The witness who eventually called the doctor in was of the belief that it was consumption, and the mother was apparantly of the belief it was some sort of 'chronic illness' too that could not be cured, or so she said. The coroner though said categorically that she did not have consumption, and that it was starvation, and so bad, because unlike the other starvation cases he'd commonly see, where they'd starve on a small or meagre diet, Julia seems not to have been eating anything whatsoever. It seems amazing to me though that her 16 year old son had not noticed, if she was so emaciated, which does back up her husbands story that she was always a very thin woman anyway. To have no food whatsoever, I do think there was some sort of eating disorder going on. After all she did have an income however small, from her son, and everyone agrees her mother was not totally starving her, even if she was dreadfully mistreating her, so the completely empty stomach does seem extremelly unusual, more what you'd expct had she been kept prisoner or something of that sort.
                                Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 22:46.

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  Just when I thought it couldn't get any sadder..all this happened over xmas. The doctor was finally called in xmas eve by the concerned neighbour, she was kept alive over xmas day by stimulants before finally giving up the ghost of life Boxing day 1865.

                                  Ah..definently been the saddest day in doing my tree, was looking foward to catching up on it over this holiday weekend..but now half feel like giving the whole thing up!

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    I would have thought that worms would show up at the post mortem.

                                    Of course, we do not know how efficient the post mortem was - what was the state of her teeth for instance - bulimic vomiting rots the teeth and leaves a roughened reddened throat. But as Bulimia was unknown, they might not have been looking for that.

                                    I am thinking of several adult women I know, quite intelligent but completely and utterly ruled and dominated by their mothers - all have weak husbands. I could see a similar sort of scenario developing where everyone in the household is convinced that granny is right and no one dare stand up to her, indeed be convinced that there was nothing to stand up against.

                                    OC

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      OC George and Julia did live with her mother and father for much of their marriage. He mentions to the coroner if he stayed with Julia he stood to inherit half the house, but the fact he'd never the less decided to abandon her proved his genuine nature and good intentions! The coroner was not impressed...In fact in his summing up though he called the mother cruel he did admit it could hardly be expected for a 78 year old woman to look after, provide for or give medical advice to a fully grown woman, especially one who 'had a husband' living and not far away.
                                      Last edited by Richard; 22-03-08, 23:11.

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        "I could see a similar sort of scenario developing where everyone in the household is convinced that granny is right and no one dare stand up to her, indeed be convinced that there was nothing to stand up against"

                                        Also did you ever see the 'Bill Oddie' episode of Who Do You Think You Are? I remember a very similar situation, his granny had dominated his house as a child, to the extent he felt it had stopped him ever having a real relationship with his father, led to the death of his infant sister, and the commital of his mother in an institution for the rest of her life. One of the saddest episodes of the sereis I've yet seen, and certainly now getting echoes of that here.

                                        Comment

                                        Working...
                                        X