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  • There is something I've always wanted .....

    to ask on here. I often wonder if people who put up requests to see if anyone can find someone on various census etc and only get a couple of replies saying they can't find them think that not many people are trying.
    I'm sure there are loads of people who look but can't find them who don't reply at all. I know because I do. I would feel silly just saying "Sorry I can't find them".

    Do you think it is better to say something so that the person knows people are trying or not?

    The other thing that I wonder about - if I see loads of replies to a query I don't always look at it because I assume that people who are better at it than me are helping. So if we all went on the thread and said "sorry can't find it" it would look like loads of replies and people might not look.

    Well, I know what I mean
    Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

  • #2
    I know what you mean Chrissie, I've spent time looking and not finding them and then others post that they can't find it so I don't add a message.
    Heather

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    • #3
      Yes Heather, it's really difficult to know what to do.
      Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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      • #4
        I do the same as you Chrissie.....if they have a lot of answers, I often don't even look at the post, because others are so much faster than I am at finding stuff.
        If I can't find anything, sometimes I add a message saying so, just so they know someone has looked and they are not going blind or stupid (which is what I assume if I can't find something). However, if others have said they can't find it, I will look and often don't leave a message and hope that someone who is better at it than me, will be able to help.

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        • #5
          If I looked and couldn't find, probably about 50% of the time I would say nothing.

          To be brutally honest this is partly an ego thing.....if they don't know I have looked, they won't know I couldn't find....(isn't that dreadful? But it's true!!)

          The rest of the time I might reply if I think I can offer some suggestions.....like, have they looked for this or that cert (say a birth cert near the census date) or have they checked the person hasn't died or changed their name? etc etc

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          • #6
            Thanks Lyn. I'm glad it isn't just me who isn't sure what to do.
            Mind you, I'm surprised to hear you say it. I always thinkof you as one of the really clever ones.
            Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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            • #7
              Oh yes Merry, if I could offer a suggestion to help I would post of course. Mind you, I haven't got much confidence so I have to be sure I'm not suggesting something stupid:o

              If I see you on a thread I go away anyway. The day I can help and you can't I shall put a banner up :D
              Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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              • #8
                p.s. I'm not as dim as I thought though. Did I tell you I have almost cracked the Wright puzzle from the other day :D
                Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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                • #9
                  Yes, I often wonder when you see a thread that has maybe 2 or 3 posts whether its short because no one can find anything or because the request was easily answered. Similarly, a thread that runs to 3 or more pages - is that just a lot of posts saying "can't find it" or "yes I found that one but its not right", or has it strayed off topic?

                  Lovely if we could have a system of symbols - though I know it can't be done - so you can see what's what.
                  ~ with love from Little Nell~
                  Chowns, Dunt, Emms, Mealing, Purvey & Smoothy

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Chrissie Smiff View Post
                    Thanks Lyn. I'm glad it isn't just me who isn't sure what to do.
                    Mind you, I'm surprised to hear you say it. I always thinkof you as one of the really clever ones.

                    NOT!!!

                    PMSL!!! I really don't know where you got that idea from!! LOL!:D:D

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                    • #11
                      Oh yes, that would be good Nell

                      From the way you have helped me in the past Lyn
                      Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Chrissie Smiff View Post
                        p.s. I'm not as dim as I thought though. Did I tell you I have almost cracked the Wright puzzle from the other day :D
                        I'm sorry I vanished after I said I was bored at the start of that! OH received an email knocking down a four year brickwall, so I was sidetracked!

                        Originally posted by Chrissie Smiff View Post
                        If I see you on a thread I go away anyway. The day I can help and you can't I shall put a banner up :D
                        You shouldn't do that! Did you see Mark Dudley helped me the other day! lolol

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Merry Monty Montgomery View Post
                          I'm sorry I vanished after I said I was bored at the start of that! OH received an email knocking down a four year brickwall, so I was sidetracked!

                          You shouldn't do that! Did you see Mark Dudley helped me the other day! lolol
                          Oh that's brilliant Merry. You must have been over the moon.
                          I nearly gave up on it but persistance paid off Well, I hope so. Will know for sure when the marriage cert turns up.

                          Oh right - there's hope for me yet then ;)
                          Chrissie passed away in January 2020.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Chrissie Smiff View Post

                            From the way you have helped me in the past Lyn
                            That must have been a fluke!! Can't even find my own lot most of the time!! LOL!!


                            Merry......great news! Wish I had the same luck!

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                            • #15
                              I sometimes look, try/fail to find an answer, and don't reply - unless it's to add a kind of reassurance that others also find it hard.

                              I do look at the number of lookers, too, sometimes. That tells you that people have looked at the thread, even if they haven't replied. (Doesn't say Who, of course!)

                              Christine
                              Researching: BENNETT (Leics/Birmingham-ish) - incl. Leonard BENNETT in Detroit & Florida ; WARR/WOR, STRATFORD & GARDNER/GARNAR (Oxon); CHRISTMAS, RUSSELL, PAFOOT/PAFFORD (Hants); BIGWOOD, HAYLER/HAILOR (Sussex); LANCASTER (Beds, Berks, Wilts) - plus - COCKS (Spitalfields, Liverpool, Plymouth); RUSE/ROWSE, TREMEER, WADLIN(G)/WADLETON (Devonport, E Cornwall); GOULD (S Devon); CHAPMAN, HALL/HOLE, HORN (N Devon); BARRON, SCANTLEBURY (Mevagissey)...

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                              • #16
                                My longest thread with no answer at the end of it was trying to locate Charles James Villiers before e and after the only known sighting at his wedding. There was an immense flurry around the Cadogan family and various illegitimate offshoots thereof, but no-one ever did find my man.
                                Uncle John - Passed away March 2020

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                                • #17
                                  Sometimes I look but feel daunted by the amount of info to be digested - especially if I'm looking in my lunchbreak or something, and feel I just don't have the time to attend to something complex. The trouble is, you need all the possible info if you're going to be able to help.

                                  Christine
                                  Researching: BENNETT (Leics/Birmingham-ish) - incl. Leonard BENNETT in Detroit & Florida ; WARR/WOR, STRATFORD & GARDNER/GARNAR (Oxon); CHRISTMAS, RUSSELL, PAFOOT/PAFFORD (Hants); BIGWOOD, HAYLER/HAILOR (Sussex); LANCASTER (Beds, Berks, Wilts) - plus - COCKS (Spitalfields, Liverpool, Plymouth); RUSE/ROWSE, TREMEER, WADLIN(G)/WADLETON (Devonport, E Cornwall); GOULD (S Devon); CHAPMAN, HALL/HOLE, HORN (N Devon); BARRON, SCANTLEBURY (Mevagissey)...

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                                  • #18
                                    I look but I am so slow if I find something in time which is no very often I will post I am now starting to try to look and post at the same time but still to slow but I do try



                                    Laura
                                    People help me so if I can help others I am glad I can

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                                    • #19
                                      Yesterday I put up a request for other eyes to look at a couple of birth places on the 1851 census. There were a couple of replies and we did establish one of the places. Later in the evening I asked again (bumped the thread up) but there were no more replies.

                                      I was a bit disappointed but I could see that the thread had been looked at loads of times. I took this to mean that no-one could read it. I take your point about saying sorry - it would have reassured me that some people had looked but would have been pointless really. I do it myself too - if I can't help I don't usually say, unless there are o other replies at all.

                                      Anne

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                                      • #20
                                        Ooh, I was first with a Canadian marriage just now. Please don't ask how I got access to Canadian records but someone here knows the answer.
                                        Uncle John - Passed away March 2020

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